11 April 2010
RACE REPORT: Pissing Incident and Disqualification from 6th Place at Honda's Motegi Race
PrincePari trained athlete CP took 6th place out of the 100 athletes participating in the Motegi Duathlon but was then shamelessly disqualified. The Duathlon consisted of a 5k run, a 30k bike ride and a finish with a 5k run. This was on Saturday 10th April and at Honda’s state of the art F1 car racing circuit (left). CPs splits were run 21 minutes; bike 49 minutes and run 23 minutes. After shameless gloating about the near podium result vis-a-vis his team mates from team Venga Venga, he was ruthlessly disqualified for going outside an island pit lane marker on the bike track rather than inside. It is clear the time gained /lost would not have affected the 6th place. CP stated that he was so preoccupied in the starting preparation area with stopping his Coach Prince from his determined effort to mark all of CP’s competitor’s bikes with piss, that he failed to read the course instructions diligently minutes before the start. Prince confirmed that he did piss on at least 77 of the other competitors bikes and that he does have a problem with compulsive marking, but the reason for CP not understanding the course was not due to this, but the overly complex Japanese Kanji vocabulary and grammar used by Honda’s infamously right wing race directors in the directions to conspire against anyone not Japanese born winning.” Honda have not commented on this poodle’s advanced cynical theorizing, but the bike pissing incidents by CP’s coach may have been enough for his disqualification alone. “A pissed on bike is not a fast bike” as even quoted from Prince’s soon to be published treatise: Prince- Puppy to Demigod under the chapter and ignored taboo subject, When and When Not to Piss Yourself Racing? Others were also disqualified for same error as CP, and they blamed the distraction on the ubiquitous pit lane girls from sponsor companies (example above). On the way home Prince met this sponsor girl for shampoo that was so silly she had a tube of Loreal Conditioner sticking out of her head.
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