25 January 2010

PRINCE REVIEW: The Stupendous New Newton Shoe

The Newton shoe is such a dashingly unprecedented running shoe development that poodle wonder Prince out of sheer excitement bit the shoe in half(see video below). The basis of the shoe is what Prince has always promoted; helping forefoot running and developing perfect technique through the PrinceMethod. Forefoot running is natural for humans, as Prince explains in his book, try running heel toe with barefeet. The sole of the shoe has 4 mohicans protruding out that rebound your forefoot as if a spring. The PrinceMethod® of running and most good modern treatises on the topic (including Romanov’s POSE method) of natural forefoot running have always theorized after having analyzed pictures/simulations of poodles in flight. The four Mohican design is obviously based on poodle paw pads.

Prince and his admirers had a day of testing the shoe with Michael Trees, Newton promoter, poodle fancier and British Triathlon record holder in Yoyogi Park, Tokyo, 23rd January 2010. The shoe requires natural poodle running by athletes as per the original picture Romanov analyzed (to the right) in the 1970’s (note not cool retro poodle haircut), with correct high knee lift, a slight lean forward and forefoot (or forefeet as with poodle) landing, quiet ninja movement, high cadence and rear foot (feet for poodles) rebounding push off.

video

This Newton shoe allows for an average of 33 seconds reduction per 10,000 meters of running and is the dream shoe for the visionaries of forefoot running: Michael Trees, Professor Romanov of the POSE Method, Zola Budd and of course, Prince Pari of the PrinceMethod. Prince stated: “ I would like to propose a toast to myself for what I have done for sport globally”. A brilliantly concise Japanese translation is below:

日本語概要:プリンスのお陰で世界の中で一番早くて最高に走る靴が新発明された. プリンス万歳!

PRINCE STUDENT RACE REPORT: Prince's Student Hailed by Japan's No1 Triathlete after Yokota Half Marathon

Coach Prince's student, Parry successfully keeps up with pace-making Japanese Legend Taro Shirato at the January 17th 2010 Frostbite half marathon in the Yokota US army airbase. After 13 months out injured due to a freak running accident involving a Pekingese dog in the 2008 Buenos Aires Marathon, it was a delightful result for Prince's athlete Parry to finish just 2 minutes behind the great man [Taro Shirato]. Coach Prince stated: "They (US Military Police) would not let poodles or afghan hounds in the base so I brooded my personal Jihad against the base while on the local beach having missed this Epic race." Parry stated:" I think Prince's recommended Newton Shoe helped; a shoe endorsed by the Prince Method and the legend [Taro Shirato].

Taro Shirato posted on his website a celebratory picture with Parry after the race and stated:

"途中、一緒に走っていたクリスと記念撮影。アスロニアのメンバーでトライアスリートの彼はなかなかポテンシャル高い!"

This translates: "We ran the race together most of the way and this Athlonia Club athlete has amazing potential to win some Triathlons".

Parry's Coach Prince's stock is rising by the week. Another of Prince's athletes; Parnell recently took 3rd place in the Antarctic Ice Marathon (read below).

21 January 2010

PRINCE METHOD BOOK EXTRACT: lazy bastards!

"If you are a lazy bastard - You will excel in this sport" Coach Prince Pari Quote

The below is an Extract from my (Prince's) forthcoming book on the Prince Method®:

"Admirably, energetic and efficient people do many productive and selfless things but are utterly pathetic at the individual pursuits of marathon and triathlon.

It is those that have the desire to feel good about doing absolutely nothing for at least 97% of the day after one short (not long) high intensity work out that succeeds at marathon and triathlon.

What makes it worse is that the lazy bastard runners and endurance sports athletes in general feel smug about this, and that they deserve a 2 hour bath and to watch 3 DVDs with tea and biscuits just because they exerted themselves close to maximum heart rate while others merely emptied the dish washer. Road runners are the worst and that is why everyone hates them.

Prince Pari's research shows the recovery incurred by being lazy bastards from doing nothing allows for superior performance in their racing and daily 20 to 200 mins of high heart rate workout. The stables that create the current running greats from Kenya and Ethiopia have adopted this Prince Method® principle years ago. Even more radical than the East Africans method is that I Prince call on us all to down a bottle of claret a night for carbo loading and anti oxidants, ideally drunk in an altitude tent.

RunnersWorld magazine, which I Prince deplore, have however adopted (plagiarized) my thoughts in a published work called "RUN LESS, RUN FASTER" which proves what I Prince have always stated: "By learning the habits of a lazy bastard, you will be faster".

"Basically if you are not a boozing lazy bastard, have no cash for an altitude tent and are not a self righteous exercise fascist, get out of our endurance multi sports." Coach Prince Pari Quote

04 January 2010

PRINCE NEWS: Sensationally the great Pinarelli Bike Company dedicate their 2010 bike to and after Coach Prince

Coach Prince is proud to hear that the esteemed world famous Pinarello bicycle company of Italy have branded their new 2010 $5,000 USD elite road racer the Pinarello Prince. This is another great honour for Prince, this website and the Prince Method®. Prince is now considering changing his official endorcement from Orbea of Spain to Pinarello and student CP may cancel order for 2010 Orbea Ordu. Prince has been frantically calling Pinarello all week to give his sincere thanks, has left many messages at the reception but has heard nothing back. When they call Prince back it is likely they will state " their respect for one of the all time great coaches blah blah blah.., and in particularly his revolutionary pedal technique (to be outlined in Prince's future book and soon on this website)". "Thank you Pinarello" says a happy prince below pictured on his powerboat in Okinawa.




03 January 2010

PRINCE NEWS: Medal Winner Parnell Hails Prince and Shows Appropriate Patronization Towards Luxumbourg

As reported from Chile, South America, Parnell ("the Arctic Fox") in his own words comments on his 3rd place in the Antarctic Ice Marathon:


"The bronze medal position would not have been possible without the learned teaching of my coach from the snowy Northern latitudes Prince Pari. Truly he is a demigod and I expect both Mme. Vuitton and the Emperor to recognize his greatness and buy his book.

"The Arctic Fox wishes to make clear that he is not related in any way to Jacques Fox or anybody else from Luxembourg. He will however be making a significant donation to the foundation to provide swimming facilities for decatriathletes in that Principality. The Arctic Fox was very distressed to learn that Jacques-San was recently forced to make a training swim of over 19,000 lengths of the 10metre olympic pool in the Ardennes forest due to the lack of available facilities"




While on the topic of the Antarctic, Prince witnessed this shocking unprovoked attack (above picture) on a polar bear in Korea over Christmas. This triathlon coaching site is firmly against animal abuse of all kinds, even in Seoul where Prince was a constant kidnap target by some of the local hot pot delicacy restaurants.